Safari

For some reason or another, I feel like whenever I blog I should be sitting indian style, in the dark, with candles, tea and rain. Well, I have tea and it is currently raining, so lets do this thing!

Tonight on my way home from church I had one of those amazingly relaxing drives home where I just had a chat with Jesus. Everything was going pretty good. I've been having fun with friends and it seemed like they got the things that get me. But tonight was sort of just a step, or more like a million steps, backwords. I was driving, crying out to God (litteraly crying) just asking why don't they get it? I wish they could see how big this summer was in my life. I wish they could understand the thigns that break my heart. I wish they could understand that everytime I see something, ie a picture or movie or even an article, about Africa or poverty or starvation, it breaks my heart! I wish they could get that it is litteraly paining me everyday that I am here, knowing that the people in Diepsloot don't know Jesus. uNkalunkalu, am I crazy? Is it wrong that I want them to understand this part of me? I feel like this is me, not just a part of me, pretty much all of me. I am one who longs for Africa, who longs to go back to Diepsloot and show love to those people, a person who longs for a different culture and longs to be the hands and feet of Jesus regardless of what comes up. After I say that, I realize that hey maybe this is one of the things that "comes up" that I have to face. Jesus give me strength to stand up for you! Keep breaking my heart for what breaks yours! Mold me to the woman you want me to be. Jesus, it' all for you!

So, yup thats my thoughts/feelings/crying-outs for the evening...
njalo themba,
Joanna